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The Dangers of Texting While Protecting Us From Terrorists

Posted by Alex_Pasternack on Saturday, Jan 09, 2010

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Last weekend, not long after some dude tried to blow up a plane with his underwear, another dude walked right through security at Newark airport, without having to submit to so much as a body scan. A thousand alarms went out, hundreds of hours of CNN were emblazoned with “breaking news,” and Barack Obama again became a terrorist suspect.

But it turns out that stranded passengers were more than happy to spend hours together, as long as they got to have big sing-a-longs of Beatles songs. Take that terrorists! And secure-area-tresspassers trying to give their beloved one last kiss!

But seriously, what do we have to learn from that whole debacle, aside from the dangers of Islamic fundamentalism?

Well the whole reason this guy got to walk past security was because security had to take a PHONE CALL from his baby’s mama or his mama, or his baby, or his al-Qaeda contact.

As with texting while driving, calling while securing secure zones in airports is not a good thing. Not unless you’re one of those bad guy drone security guards in a video game. NO WAY would I have made it past three levels in Metal Gear Solid if those guards hadn’t been so excited about their Nexus Ones and wandered away from their posts. No way.

Then again, if you’re working for the TSA, one of those racial profiling apps can be pretty useful. Also, the CNN headlines app. Kind of essential.

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  • Doctor-manhattan-watchmen_small

    The_Good_Doc 6 months ago

    Have you guys seen what the body scans look like? It's basically softcore porn.

  • Images-2_small

    jesuischaud 6 months ago

    hahahaha, need to check em out then

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Alex_Pasternack

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New York, United States
Member since 2009

An enthusiast of science, technology and web surfing, Alex Pasternack has written about culture, politics and the built and natural environments in places as far afield as Sichuan, China, Ulan Ude,...

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